Maja is 5 years old, and the report mainly describes difficulty finishing play and moving on to the next activities, especially when getting ready to leave the house. This happens most often in the morning before leaving and in the evening, when she is told that screen time or play is ending. The difficulty occurs daily and usually lasts from 11 to 30 minutes. The description mainly concerns home.
In practice, it looks like this: after being told about a change, Maja delays completing the next steps, refuses to cooperate, and hides the item she has been using. She says that she “hasn’t finished,” moves away from the adult, negotiates, and postpones starting the next activities. In response, the adult reminds her several times and then begins doing some of the tasks for the child; when tension rises, there may also be a raised voice. After several reminders, the adult turns off the screen or helps with getting dressed, and Maja gradually returns to her usual activity.
The observations provided indicate that the greatest tension appears when she needs to stop doing something enjoyable or move on to a less appealing activity. There is no description of behavior outside the home or information about similar difficulties in other settings, so this picture specifically concerns transitions between activities at home. It may be cautiously assumed that Maja needs more time to wrap up her play and adjust to change than is convenient for those around her.
Several important strengths are visible. The family has noticed what helps to some extent: a visual schedule, one reminder five minutes in advance, and the opportunity to choose the order of two activities. This shows that Maja responds better when the situation is more predictable. The family also has a clear goal: calmer transitions between the different parts of the day and greater independence when getting ready to leave. The fact that the family can name the difficulty, describe when it becomes more intense, and notice helpful elements is an important resource for further organizing everyday situations.
The most likely pattern in this situation is that the difficulty appears when Maja has to stop doing something enjoyable and move on to the next part of the day. The description provided indicates that this happens most often in the morning before leaving home and in the evening after being told that screen time or play is ending. These are moments when the change may feel sudden from the child’s perspective, while the current activity still holds her attention and interest.
Context: home, daily routines, morning or evening, and a situation involving a transition from one activity to another. In addition, the difficulty may be greater when Maja is deeply engaged in play or screen time, because interrupting the activity is clearly demanding for her. However, we do not have information about whether fatigue, rushing, hunger, noise, or other environmental factors also play a role.
Early signal: Maja says that she “hasn’t finished,” moves away, negotiates, or postpones the next activities. The description also mentions hiding the item she has been using, which may look like an attempt to keep the situation under her control and delay the change. It is not known whether bodily tension, a change in tone of voice, crying, silence, or other early signals appear beforehand, as this was not described.
Behavior: after being told about a change, Maja delays, refuses, and prolongs completing the next steps. In practice, this means daily resistance to ending play and getting ready to leave. The description indicates that the whole sequence usually lasts from 11 to 30 minutes, so this is not a single brief objection but a longer, drawn-out transition.
Adult response: the adult reminds her several times, then begins doing some activities for the child and speaks in a raised voice. This may increase tension in the situation, especially if the reminders are repeated and the pace becomes more pressing. At the same time, the information shows that certain elements help: a visual schedule, one reminder five minutes in advance, and the opportunity to choose the order of two activities.
What happens afterward: after several reminders, the adult turns off the screen or helps with getting dressed, and Maja gradually returns to her usual activity. This suggests that the difficulty does not continue all the time but eases when the transition is completed and the situation no longer requires further negotiation. However, it is not known whether calm returns immediately after such an episode or whether some tension remains, as this was not described.
It is worth noting the gaps in the information: there is no information about exactly what happens just before refusal, how Maja responds to the initial announcement, whether similar difficulties occur outside the home, or whether there are easier and more difficult days. We also do not know whether the main issue is the activity change itself, the ending of screen time, or more generally the moment when she needs to interrupt what she is doing.
Below are several possible mechanisms worth observing in Maja. These are not diagnoses, but hypotheses that may help in understanding what could be maintaining the difficulty.
1) Difficulty stopping an enjoyable activity and moving on to the next part of the day
This may be the simplest explanation, because the difficulty occurs mainly in the morning before leaving and in the evening after screen time or play ends. This is supported by the observations: delaying after being told about a change, saying “I haven’t finished,” moving away, negotiating, and postponing the next activities. It is also supported by the fact that after several reminders, the child gradually returns to her usual activity, meaning that the transition is possible but costs her a great deal of tension. Alternatively, it may be less about the change itself and more about the fact that the final part of the activity feels especially valuable to Maja, making it hard for her to give up what she is doing.
How to check the pattern: for several days, it may be helpful to compare her responses to different activities: after screen time, after free play, and after neutral activities. If resistance increases mainly when something enjoyable is ending, this hypothesis becomes more likely.
2) A need for greater predictability and time to prepare for change
It is possible that Maja manages better when she knows in advance what will happen next and has a clear order of actions. This is supported by the information that a visual schedule, one reminder five minutes in advance, and choosing the order of two activities are helpful. This suggests that predictability may reduce tension. Alternatively, these approaches may work simply because the adult speaks more briefly and calmly at those times, rather than because of the form of support itself.
How to check the pattern: it may be helpful to see whether the difficulty is smaller when the announcement is consistent, brief, and specific, and when the child sees the next step in a picture or hears exactly what will happen and in what order. If so, predictability may be an important factor.
3) Tension increases when the adult repeatedly reminds her or takes over some tasks
The description indicates that the adult reminds her several times, then begins doing some tasks for the child and speaks in a raised voice. This may unintentionally increase tension, because the child receives many signals at once: time pressure, the adult’s emotions, and a loss of influence over the situation. Alternatively, the issue may not result from the adult’s response, but from the fact that mornings and evenings are simply the most rushed and demanding times for the whole family.
How to check the pattern: it may be helpful to compare days when the adult limits themselves to one reminder, calmly follows the agreed plan, and does not immediately take over for the child, with more rushed days. If the transition is calmer with fewer interventions, that is an important clue.
4) Hiding the item being used may be a way of extending control over the situation
This behavior may serve the function of “I’m not finished yet,” meaning it extends contact with play or screen time. This is supported by the description that after being told about a change, the child hides the item she has been using and postpones completing the next activities. Alternatively, it may simply be an automatic response, without an intention to make things difficult, resulting from emotions and rushing.
How to check the pattern: it may be helpful to observe whether hiding the item occurs mainly when the end of play is approaching, and whether it stops when the child is clearly shown the next step and has a short amount of time to wrap up the activity.
The most likely explanation seems to be a combination of several things: difficulty with transitions, a need for predictability, and increased tension with repeated reminders. It is worth observing which of these elements most strongly affects Maja’s mornings and evenings.
In a difficult situation, a short and calm sequence works best: first safety, then reducing stimulation, followed by a clear message, a boundary, and only afterward reconnecting. For Maja, who is 5 years old, it is especially important that the adult does not add more words once tension is already rising, but instead guides the situation in small steps.
If tension is just beginning to build, the adult can do the following: move close enough to keep the child within sight and reach, calmly move aside any item that makes the transition harder, and make sure that no one trips, gets hurt, or is pushed. Then it is helpful to reduce stimulation: turn off the screen, move toys aside, reduce the number of people speaking at once, and speak quietly and briefly. One message is enough, for example: “I can see it is hard to finish. We are finishing now and going to get dressed.” This message does not need to be long or explain everything. The boundary should be clear and calm: “The screen is off,” or “The toy stays here, and now we move on.” After setting the boundary, the adult does not need to keep persuading or negotiating, but instead allows a moment for the transition and shows the next step, for example: “First shoes, then coat. You can choose the order.”
If the child hides the item she has been using, moves away, or says “I haven’t finished yet,” the adult can name this without judgment: “I hear that you want to stay with your play a little longer.” Then return to the agreement: “It is finished now. I will help you put it away and move on.” Limiting choices to two simple options also works well when they fit the plan: “Do you wash your hands first or put on your shoes?” This gives her some influence without weakening the boundary.
When tension begins to rise further and the child delays, refuses, walks away, or argues more intensely, the adult should move from explaining to protecting the situation. At that point, safety becomes more important than continuing the conversation. You can say: “I can see this is becoming difficult. I am stopping the play because it is time to leave.” If the child tries to stop the adult, throws objects, or comes close in a way that could result in injury, it is worth safely interrupting the action: move sharp, heavy, or fragile items away, take the child and yourself to a calmer place, and, if needed, end the activity itself and return to it later. In that moment, the goal is not to win an argument, but to make sure no one gets hurt.
In practice, a simple order is helpful: first stop anything that may be unsafe, then reduce noise, movement, and the number of words. If necessary, the adult can stand between the child and the source of risk, move away from edges, put away an item that is being thrown, or close the door to a room to limit chaos. The message should be calm and brief: “I won’t let you throw that. I’m moving it away,” or “Stop, we are taking a break now.” This is not the time for lengthy explanations, because the child may not be able to take them in then.
If tension rises in waves, it is helpful to repeat the same sequence without changing the rules: safety, fewer stimuli, one message, a boundary. For example: “I can see you are very angry. I am stopping the screen.” Then: “You can sit beside me or come with me to the kitchen.” This approach gives the child a simple way out of a difficult moment without giving up the boundary. For a child Maja’s age, predictability works better than another attempt at explaining.
Once the situation has calmed, it is helpful to reconnect without bringing up past mistakes. Briefly: “I’m here with you. We can finish together.” Or: “That was hard; now we are returning to the plan.” Reconnecting in this way helps the child regain a sense of support and move on more easily. With Maja, you can use what is already helpful: a visual schedule, one reminder five minutes in advance, and choosing the order of two activities. This way, the adult talks less during the crisis and guides the situation more through a calm rhythm. It is also worth returning to a normal tone afterward, without a long discussion of the conflict, so that the child sees that the difficult moment has passed and that you can work together again.
Between episodes, it is especially worthwhile to build predictability, because in the situations described, the difficulty occurs mainly in the morning before leaving and in the evening after being told that screen time or play is ending. A consistent, brief framework for the day may be helpful for Maja: first a message, then one next activity, without adding many instructions at once. Since the visual schedule already works, it is good to use it as a consistent point of reference. In the morning, you can show Maja two or three pictures in the same order, for example: bathroom, getting dressed, shoes. This way, she does not have to guess each time what comes next. An easy way to introduce this is to place the schedule in one location and refer to it every day with one sentence: “Now let’s look at what comes after breakfast.”
In this situation, it is also important to prepare her for changes, but in a brief and specific way, because even one reminder five minutes in advance has already proven helpful. It is worth maintaining this approach rather than repeating messages multiple times. Before leaving in the morning, you might say: “In five minutes, we are finishing play and putting on shoes,” and in the evening: “In five minutes, screen time ends, then we brush teeth.” It helps when the announcement is always similar and does not stretch over a long period, because Maja then knows better what to expect. A simple solution is to set one time signal, such as a timer, and keep one calm reminder instead of several.
Practicing skills is best done when there is no rush or tension. Maja already has experience choosing the order of two activities, so it is worth continuing to practice this in calm moments, not only when it is time to leave. You can practice a short sequence together: “First we put away the toy, then we put on the coat,” or “First we turn off the screen, then you choose your pajamas.” Practicing “in advance” helps her become familiar with the order and reduces resistance in the real situation. If she hides the item she has been using after being told about a change, you can practice a simple ritual beforehand: “We finish, put it on the shelf, and come back after lunch.” Acting out the whole morning routine together step by step, for example while playing with dolls, can also work well, because Maja then learns to move between activities without time pressure.
Encouraging cooperation will be easier if the adult notices every small step in the right direction, rather than only full compliance with an instruction. Since the adult currently begins doing some tasks for Maja after several reminders, it is worth shifting attention to what she did independently: put away the toy, came to the hallway, chose the order. Brief acknowledgment such as “I see you came after the first reminder,” or “You helped yourself by putting away the screen activity,” strengthens cooperation without increasing tension. Another good, simple step is to limit the number of words during the transition and offer one clear choice: “Shoes first or coat first?” This supports her sense of influence, which is important at this age, while also keeping the boundary clear.
Expectations should be adjusted to Maja’s age: she is a five-year-old who is still learning to end an enjoyable activity without prolonged delaying. You can expect cooperation, but not a very long period of independently switching tasks without support. If the transition currently lasts 11–30 minutes in the morning or evening, the goal for now may not be “perfect obedience,” but gradually shortening the time and reducing negotiation. It is better to assume that she needs brief guidance than to expect her to end play after one message without difficulty. In practice, this means calm, consistent rules, less explaining during resistance, and more preparation beforehand. This gives Maja the opportunity to gradually move through the next parts of the day with greater calm and independence.
Beginning of tension
Refusal
Changing activities
Behavior that threatens safety
Returning to calm
These messages work best when they are brief, calm, and said in the same tone every time. It is worth saying less, but more clearly, without explaining everything at once. For a child this age, simple choices also work well: two options that both lead to the same goal. This makes it easier to move from resistance to action without shaming or prolonging the conversation.
In this situation, it is worth avoiding several responses, because they usually increase tension and make it harder for Maja to move on to the next part of the day.
Long lectures when tension is high
When the child delays, refuses, or hides the item she has been using, lengthy explanations often stop getting through. In that moment, Maja needs a short, clear message rather than many words. A safer alternative is one sentence, for example: “Now we are finishing play and putting on shoes,” followed by calm guidance forward. If necessary, it is better to return to the conversation later, when emotions have settled.
Raising your voice
Raising your voice usually increases tension and may makethat the child will withdraw even more, start negotiating, or delay taking action. It is not that the parent is doing something “wrong” — it is simply easy to enter a spiral when there is strong tension. A safer alternative is a lower, calm tone and brief messages. It also helps to pause for a moment instead of repeating the instruction louder and louder.
Unpredictable consequences
If something ends one time but not another, and sometimes the adult completes some tasks for the child or changes the plan during the process, Maja may find it difficult to predict what will happen. This usually increases resistance. A safer alternative is a simple, consistent pattern: first a warning, then the end of the activity, followed by the next step. It is worth sticking to the previously agreed plan, because predictability helps the child feel oriented.
Labeling
Terms such as “lazy,” “stubborn,” or “naughty” do not help the child understand what to do, and they make it harder for the adult to respond calmly. It is better to describe the behavior without judgment: “I can see it is hard for you to finish,” “You are putting this off until later.” This way of speaking leaves room for cooperation instead of shame and conflict.
Negotiating a boundary after unsafe behavior
If behavior occurs that threatens safety or clearly makes leaving difficult, it is not a good time to bargain about the boundary itself. At that point, the child usually first needs the situation to be stopped and simple guidance. A safer alternative is to briefly name the boundary, ensure safety, and only later, when emotions have settled, return to a conversation about what was difficult.
In practice, what works best for Maja is a calm, repeatable structure: a brief warning, one reminder, a clear next step, and the presence of an adult who helps her move through the change without prolonging the conflict.
For this first stage, it is worth choosing only 2–3 priorities so as not to overwhelm either Maja or the adults. The most important starting points are:
In practice, this means that during the first week the focus should be less on “putting out fires” and more on observing and organizing the daily flow of mornings and evenings. For Maja, the difficulty appears mainly in the morning before leaving and in the evening after being told that screen time or play is ending. This is a good place to begin, because these situations are repeated and can be prepared for in advance.
Days 1–3: establishing a baseline
Days 4–7: preparing the environment and increasing predictability
Week 2: one consistent adult response
In the second week, the goal is not “perfect obedience,” but a repeatable pattern. The adult can follow the same sequence:
If Maja says that she “has not finished yet,” the adult can acknowledge this statement without changing the plan. A brief response might be: “I can see it is hard to finish. Now we are finishing and moving on to getting dressed.” Then it is best to move into action rather than continue explaining.
It is important for adults to agree on one version of the response. If one person gives several reminders, another starts doing tasks for the child, and a third raises their voice, Maja receives mixed signals and the transition usually becomes longer. It is better to choose a simple structure: warning, help with the first step, calm completion of the activity.
Safety guidelines
Realistic flexibility
This stage does not need to go perfectly. If Maja transitions more calmly one day and delays again another day, this is still part of learning a new pattern. Small choices can be allowed, but only within the boundaries of the agreed plan, for example choosing the order of two activities or choosing between two tops.
If the morning is especially difficult, it is better to simplify the plan rather than expand it. If the child is tired in the evening, it is worth shortening the message and not adding extra instructions. Flexibility should help maintain calm, not blur boundaries.
At the end of the first stage, it is useful to answer three questions: what most often triggers resistance, what helps even a little, and which adult response best supports calm. This is enough to enter the following weeks with a clearer plan.
In weeks 3–4, it is worth building on what has already started to work: the visual schedule, one reminder five minutes earlier, and giving Maja a choice between two orders of activities. At this stage, the goal is not “perfect obedience,” but gradually shortening the transition and building greater predictability. The observations provided indicate that Maja still has the most difficulty in the morning before leaving and in the evening when ending screen time or play, so it is best to maintain the plan in these two regular situations without adding many new demands at once.
One skill that can be practiced gradually is ending an activity after a signal and moving to the next step without putting everything off until later. In practice, this means a very small, repeatable pattern: warning, brief pause, ending, and then immediately the first specific step. For example: “In five minutes, we finish screen time. Then you choose: shoes first or coat first.” When the time has passed, the adult returns to one brief message rather than repeatedly explaining or negotiating. If Maja starts saying that she has not finished yet, this can be seen as a signal that she needs help with the transition, not another long discussion. Calmly naming the stage can help: “I can see it is hard to stop. Now we are finishing and moving on to the next step.”
Building this skill should be very gentle. At first, it is worth expecting only one small element of cooperation, for example putting the item being used back in its place or walking to the hallway. Only then can further steps be added, such as putting on one item of clothing or packing one thing. This division reduces the risk that Maja will feel overwhelmed by the entire task at once.
Generalizing to another daily situation is also important. Since the difficulty appears in the morning and evening, a similar pattern can be used at both times so Maja does not need to learn something from scratch each time. In the morning, the plan may sound like: “Visual schedule, one reminder, choice of the order of two activities.” In the evening, similarly: “Five more minutes of screen time, then it ends, then washing and pajamas.” The aim is for these two transitions to look similar, because repetition usually makes it easier for the child to understand what will happen next. If one situation goes a little better, the same approach can be transferred to the other without changing the whole routine.
Based on the observed direction of change, it is also worth making a small adjustment to the adults’ plan. The description indicates that when there are several reminders and the adult starts doing some tasks for Maja, tension rises and the transition becomes longer. Therefore, it is better to limit the number of messages and decide in advance what the adult will do if Maja delays. Instead of increasing pressure, calm consistency can be maintained: one warning, one return to the message, then help only with the first step. If the child hides an object or moves away, the adult can briefly remind her of the rules and return to the task without escalating the conflict. This does not guarantee steady improvement, but it may reduce the number of moments when the situation intensifies.
It is also worth observing whether, after following this pattern, Maja returns to her usual activity more quickly. If so, the plan can be maintained without increasing the pace. If the very beginning of the transition remains the most difficult part, it is better to simplify the first step even more rather than add further reminders.
Over the next two weeks, it is worth maintaining what gives Maja the best chance of calmer transitions between activities: a visual schedule, one advance reminder, and the opportunity to choose the order of two activities. These are simple elements that help because they reduce the number of surprises and give the child a clear point of reference. For a child of this age, a brief message also works well, without lengthy explanations and without repeatedly repeating the same request.
It is worth focusing on reinforcing one simple step at a time. For example, in the morning you can practice only the start of leaving: first the warning, then the choice of order, and only later the next activities. The same applies in the evening — first ending screen time or play, then moving to the next part of the routine. If Maja begins to resist after just one reminder, there is no need to add further messages or increase the pace. It is often better to calmly repeat the same sequence and guide her through it consistently without increasing pressure.
A good next step is to transfer the same simple structure to another context. If it works when ending screen time, a similar pattern can be used when ending play before leaving. If it helps in the morning, you can check whether the same order works in the evening. The point is for Maja to recognize a familiar rhythm: warning, choice, completion. There is no need to introduce many new rules at once, because then it becomes harder to assess what truly helps.
At this stage, it is also important to independently summarize the six weeks in a simple, specific way. Helpful questions include: what Maja did more easily than at the beginning, at which point resistance still appeared, what the adults were able to maintain without changing the rules, and what needed simplifying. It is best to base this summary on daily observations: whether the time spent protesting has shortened, whether Maja more often starts after one reminder, whether she puts off subsequent tasks less often, and whether she hides the item she is using less often.
It is worth keeping everything that supports predictability and independence: a clear warning, a consistent order, limited choice, and a calm tone. What needs simplifying is anything that becomes too long or overly complicated, such as multi-step explanations, frequent negotiations, or adding new demands when the child is already tense. If there is clearly greater resistance in the morning or evening, longer delays, or the adult begins to do things for Maja more and more often, this is a signal not to tighten the pressure. In such a situation, it is better to pause the plan at its current level, return to a simpler version, and maintain it for a few days.
It is also worth pausing the plan when Maja is already beginning to move to the next activity with less resistance and the adult sees that adding further steps does not bring a clear benefit. At that point, the goal is not to do more, but to maintain what works and give the child time to reinforce simple actions in everyday situations.
To observe progress, it is worth choosing a few simple measures that can be checked in daily situations without additional tools. In Maja’s case, the most useful may be: the frequency of difficult transitions, the duration of each episode, the intensity shown through behavior, and the time needed to return to usual activity.
1. Frequency
At the beginning, you can count how many times a day difficulty appears when ending play, turning off the screen, or getting ready to leave. The description indicates that this happens every day, especially in the morning and evening. After 2 weeks, it is worth checking whether the number of such situations is lower, similar, or higher than at the start. After 4 weeks, it is helpful to compare whether difficult transitions still occur daily or whether some of them are now managed more calmly. After 6 weeks, you can assess whether episodes are less frequent than at the beginning and whether they affect fewer moments of the day.
2. Duration
At present, a single situation usually lasts 11–30 minutes. This is a good measure for tracking change because it shows whether the child accepts the change more quickly. After 2 weeks, you can compare whether episodes are becoming shorter, even by a few minutes. After 4 weeks, it is important to check whether the difficulty still extends through most mornings and evenings or whether it ends more quickly more often. After 6 weeks, it is worth seeing whether the typical duration is shorter than at the beginning and whether prolonged delays happen less often.
3. Intensity of behavior
Intensity can be described through simple, visible features: whether Maja only protests verbally, or also moves away, negotiates, delays tasks, hides the item she is using, and clearly postpones the transition. At the start, the behavior includes several of these elements at once. After 2 weeks, it is worth checking whether fewer elements of resistance appear in a single situation. After 4 weeks, you can compare whether fewer reminders and less adult intervention are needed. After 6 weeks, the goal of observation is to see whether the protest is shorter and simpler rather than an extended delay.
4. Time to return to usual activity
Currently, after several reminders and adult help, Maja gradually returns to her usual activity. It is worth measuring how much time passes from the first warning about the change to the moment when the child returns to calm activity. After 2 weeks, compare whether this return happens more quickly. After 4 weeks, check whether less support is needed after the change before the child begins the next activity. After 6 weeks, it is useful to assess whether returning to the rhythm of the day is clearly smoother than at the beginning.
It will be most helpful to record these four things briefly, every day, in a similar way. This makes it easier to see not only whether the difficulty is still appearing, but also whether its course is changing.
It is worth discussing this situation with a pediatrician, child psychologist, or another appropriate specialist when the difficulty begins to go beyond ordinary daily tension around changing activities. Maja’s description primarily shows difficulty ending play and moving to subsequent activities, which appears every day, mainly in the morning and evening. This pattern alone does not yet explain where the difficulty comes from, but it may be a sign that the child needs additional support in managing transitions.
It is worth seeking consultation sooner if there is a risk of injury in these situations. For example, when the child pulls forcefully, runs away, throws objects, blocks leaving the house, or the adult must act in a rush to safely complete the morning or evening routine. Similarly, it is a good idea to speak with a specialist when reactions are very intense and difficult to manage without raising voices, physical struggles, or frequently taking over tasks from the child.
Another important sign is a sudden change in functioning. If Maja used to manage better and now the difficulty has clearly intensified, it is worth discussing. The same applies if previously acquired skills are lost, for example if the child stops using simple ways of transitioning between activities that used to help, or suddenly begins having difficulty with things she previously managed well.
A consultation may also be helpful when similar difficulties occur not only at home but also in other places, or when they interfere with many daily situations: leaving, getting dressed, ending screen time, transitioning to sleep, or other regular points in the day. The more areas are affected, the more worthwhile it is to seek a broader perspective.
It is also a good idea to contact a specialist when the family is unable to carry out the agreed plan safely. If, despite warnings, a visual schedule, and calm efforts, the transition still ends with high tension and adults feel they cannot maintain boundaries without escalation, it is worth asking for support. Not to judge the child, but to choose support that is realistic to use at home and safe for everyone.
The map organizes the observed sequence and does not determine its cause.
| Context | What comes before | Behavior | Adult response | What follows |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| ['home'] | Most often, the difficulty appears in the morning before leaving and in the evening after being told that screen time or play is ending. | The child says that she has not finished, moves away, negotiates, and delays completing subsequent tasks. | The adult gives several reminders, then begins completing some tasks for the child and speaks in a raised voice. | After several reminders, the adult turns off the screen or helps with dressing, and the child gradually returns to usual activity. |
In this situation: Ensure safety, limit words, and calmly maintain the boundary.
Earlier: Give advance notice of the change and practice a brief plan during a calm moment.
Avoid: Do not shame, label, or give a long lecture when there is tension.
Pause the plan: Stop the plan and seek appropriate support if safety cannot be maintained.
In the moment: Ensure safety, use fewer words, and calmly maintain the boundary.
Earlier: Give advance notice of the change and practise a short plan during a calm moment.
Avoid: Do not shame, label, or give a long lecture when emotions are heightened.
Pause the plan: Stop the plan and seek appropriate help if safety cannot be maintained.
| Observation | Starting point | Expected direction | Check-in |
|---|---|---|---|
| Frequency of the observed behaviour | daily | decrease or less impact on daily life | day 14 |
| Time to return to usual activity | To be recorded for 7 days | shorter duration | day 14 |
| Use of the practised adult response | To be recorded for 7 days | greater consistency | day 14 |